Spending time with mothers from around the world – a definite bonus of living in the UAE – means that I have been able to easily identify the traits shared solely by Arab parents, considering that I have embraced them myself, practically subconsciously. Sure, parents the world over have similar common denominators in that they all love their children, they worry about them and they no longer sleep. But the compilation below is specific to Arab parents, mostly those from the Levant.
Based on personal experience, I present to you: The Top Four Ways to Tell If a Kid Has Arab Parents.
Number one, the kid is decked out in gold. Regardless of age, whether a suckling baby or a rambunctious toddler dangling from the monkey bars in the playground or a 7-year-old riding the school bus, regardless of gender, there will be gold on the child. My daughter’s ears were pierced at two months of age and every Westerner I’ve ever run into has expressed surprise at her little, diamond earrings, courtesy of her doting grandfather. My ears? They were pierced when I was 15 days old by my determined grandmother. Baby A owns no less than 11 bracelets, two of which she wears at all times (even in the bath and when she’s sleeping). My little brother wore a gold chain around his neck for the first 10 years of his life before he lost it. It was quickly replaced.
Indicator number two: somewhere on a newborn will be something to ward off the evil eye. This stuff is serious and babies must be protected at all costs. Usually, a tiny, gold pendant with verses of the Quran on it, together with a blue, turquoise bead or a tiny, blue eye (with gold) will be pinned on a baby’s swaddling blanket, especially if visitors come calling. Grandmothers will express deep disapproval if the mother forgets to pin the talisman back on the child after a clothing change. Baby A has at least four different gold items to ward off the evil eye, most of which were gifts. (I may have managed to lose all of them.)
Indicator number three: Arab parents will order baby favours to distribute to family and friends when they visit to celebrate the baby’s arrival – blue for boys and pink for girls. The favours can be: faux baby bottles stuffed with chocolates, silver frames engraved with the baby’s name and birth date, tiny piggy banks, porcelain dishes and so on. Most will come tied up in a ribbon on which hangs a tiny, miniature baby. That baby is always pearly white, with sparkling blue eyes and golden ringlets. Never mind that Arabs mostly boast olive skin and dark hair and eyes. The baby favours will always come with blond babies attached. Always.
And the fourth giveaway that a child has Arab parents: mothers call their babies “mama” and fathers call their babies “baba” or “daddy” or “papa”; whatever word the child uses for the father. This makes no sense, I know. It is the hardest thing for me to explain to my non-Arab friends when they hear me say to Baby A: “Mama! No! Yalla, Mama, stop it, don’t put that in your nose, Mama!” Same goes for Mr T; he’s either saying “Hi, Daddy!” to Baby A, or, “Daddy? Did you just hit me? No, Daddy, no.” There is no explanation for this. It’s a form of endearment that probably has our children ridiculously confused. But if you hear a mother shouting out to her kid and calling “mama”, know she’s an Arab, guaranteed.
Hala Khalaf is a freelance writer based in Abu Dhabi
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