Director: Sajid Khan
Starring: Akshay Kumar, John Abraham, Riteish Deshmukh, Shreyas Talpade, Mithun Chakraborty, Asin Thottumkal, Jacqueline Fernandez, Zarine Khan, Shazahn Padamsee, Rishi Kapoor, Randhir Kapoor and Boman Irani
Housefull 2 has a crocodile biting a man's bum, a python munching on another's testicles, and not to be forgotten, and an unfortunate scene where a dark-skinned man is heckled as a man from Africa. If you have seen the first part of this senseless, high energy, neon-colour-popping farce of a franchise, then you won't be surprised.
To the director's defence, the film, in its trailers or its poster, never pretends to be an inspired piece of cinematic excellence. The storyline is more like a patchwork quilt of sequences whose overall design doesn't make sense even when seen from a distance.
Chintu (Rishi Kapoor) and Dabboo (Randhir Kapoor) are the heads of two feuding Kapoor families and are stepbrothers. Though they live right next to each other, their wives and daughters hurl nonsensical insults and themselves at each other with frightening frequency. Some of the priceless invectives include, "militant octopus", "you bony fish" and "botoxed, ageing woman".
Dabboo and Chintu, at the height of their lifelong war, decide to find and marry the richest man in the United Kingdom to their daughters (Asin and Fernandez). After another racist and sexist slight that Chintu throws at Jai's (Talpade) father, Jai gets together with his friend Jolly (Deshmukh), the son of the UK's richest man, JD (Chakraborty), who is also, mind-bogglingly enough, a dacoit from India's badlands, to teach Chintu a lesson. They decide to send Max (Abraham), a small-time con, and Sunny (Kumar), a slightly more suave con, to the Kapoors' pretending to be the coveted suitor, Jolly, to teach them a lesson.
One hour of painful gags and slapstick sequences later, the whole cast converges at JD's house for another 45 minutes of retina-burning idiocy. The film includes gemlike dialogue such as "Jolly, meet Dolly. Dolly, meet Jolly, now let's play Holi" and "langoors, now let's eat angoors", which, roughly translated makes as much sense as "baboons, let's eat the raccoons".
Akshay Kumar is the only saving grace, with good comic timing and his trademark deadpan expression. Deshmukh is also cast fine with his perpetually pained expression that makes sense, given the film's plot. Chakraborty has the only role with some gravitas and does justice to it. The women exist only to prance around in handkerchiefs that pose as dresses, scream, pout and jiggle their shapely derrières. For the first half of the film, you will have a hard time differentiating one woman from the other.
As for the music, most of it is forgettable except Anarkali Disco Chali, which sticks out thanks to Malaika Arora's enviable quadriceps and triceps.
However, Sajid Khan should not be too worried about the film's performance at the box office because judging by the audience's laughter fits that were terrifyingly close to cardiac arrests, it will do just fine.
• Housefull 2 is currently showing in UAE cinemas
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